Nick recalls the day when he reached the end of his
alcoholic rope, waking up in a hospital, blind in one eye, and thoroughly
confused. He had lain comatose for eight hours. Just the day before,
he had been released from a rural county jail in south central Colorado,
and immediately he went from the jail to get drunk. The nearly fatal
auto accident that next morning put his life in perspective. "It
hit me right then that I wasn't going as far as God wanted me to."
The course of Nick's life has not been a straight line. He was angry
with God for two failed marriages, which went hand-in-hand with the demise
of a successful custom roofing business, and the loss of a horse ranch
in Montana. Despite numerous attempts to quit drinking, he seemed to
look only in the wrong directions.
"In retrospect, I was so consumed with being mad that I didn't
see how much worse it could have been. God was right there, lifting me
up."
Although he had been in another rehabilitation program several years
before, he discovered that the New Life program was radically different
from his expectations. When he thinks of how he found his way to Harvest
Farm, he concludes, "I just got tired of not being able to quit
drinking." The New Life program has helped him to sort out his mistakes. "All
my life, it's just like I was going through a funnel," he reflects. "I
try to do things my way and I hit the side here and the side there, and
I'm finally narrowing down to where God put me on this Earth to be."
"I don't believe God just waves His magic wand and it's all over
with. I thought He would, but I had to quit drinking. He had to get me
here."
Harvest Farm's distinctly rural setting has been a key factor in Nick's
recovery. He found his best inspiration from God on his morning walks
or bicycle rides to the dining hall, which reminded him of childhood
times spent alone in the woods. "That's my way of praying," he
explains.
"I see so many miracles here."
Nick can count his steps to recovery since coming to Harvest Farm. In
his time here, he gained a job at a local nursing home where he discovered
an unexpected talent in caring for elderly people. His employers were
so impressed that they provided training for him to become a Certified
Nursing Assistant. "That's something I never really thought about
doing. I've been in the construction business for 23 years. This was
off the wall. I have a phobia about old people and getting old," he
says. "I went in and I was actually good at it. They told me they
wanted to hire me, to come in any time, they'd work with me because I
had a knack for actually communicating with the people, especially [those
patients] that they couldn't get through to. Basically what I'd do is
just hold their hands and pray with them. That really sounds weird, but
that's what I did. I'd pray to Jesus: 'Just come through and reach that
part of their mind that could still think and reason and let them know
You're there.' People who were slapping and talking gibberish, I was
able to calm them down, dress them and feed them." This experience
has led him to consider a new career direction.
"All the while I was working I was talking to God. Instead of just
telling Him what I wanted to do I would just ask Him to guide me."
The program's educational tools have helped him to drastically improve
basic math and language skills, prerequisites for the college psychology
courses he aspires to. "I came here to learn and there are plenty
of opportunities to learn," he says, referring to the on-site Literacy
and Education Center (LEC), where he was initiated in the use of computers.
"Now it's my turn to see where God takes me. I know the Nursing
certification is step one and then there are opportunities for further
education."
Despite the troubles of his past, Nick has reached a point of reconciliation
with himself and his children. Of the five children he raised mostly
by himself, Nick speaks with a certain pride. He looks forward to joining
his youngest son to work on the restoration of a 1965 Chevrolet truck--a
project that returns him to his own youth, when, at age nineteen, he
owned a custom auto body shop. "It's one of my passions," he
remembers. The finished truck will be the sixteen-year-old boy's first
car.
As a Harvest Farm graduate, Nick attended his last morning devotion
and earnestly shared his message of hope and faith in a final farewell
to program friends and staff. "I hope that I become so obsessed
with being full of joy that it's going to come out of me," he told
them. "If I could walk into a room and make people smile, that would
be so cool." A group of well-wishers came forward afterwards to
pray and cheer him on.
Glowing with confidence, he says he realizes that life still holds in
store formidable challenges, but he adds, "I've got a Bible and
I've got a lot of peace in my life that I didn't have when I came here."
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